Here be Dragons

An Open Letter to Rick Santorum from an interested observer across the pond:

Dear Rick (I hope you don’t mind me calling you that),

I have noticed your recent achievement of almost winning in Iowa. Congratulations on only losing by 8 votes. However, I think there are a few things you may need to review before moving on to the next part of the election process.

I believed (up until recently) that you were a proponent of small government & that the state should interfere as little as possible in the lives of the people.

This may come as some surprise to you , but women are, brace yourself, actually people!! (yes really)

I know, I know, it’s a lot to take in.. but take a deep breath and continue with me.

I imagine that when you said, “Many of the Christian faith have said, well, that’s okay, contraception is okay. It’s not okay. It’s a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be”, you may not have been aware of this.

It may come as a shock to you that people (women – and yes really, we are considered to be people) may object to this interpretation of the role of contraception. Aside from being a responsible way of avoiding unwanted and potentially life destroying pregnancies, contraception can be, and in fact, is used to treat other medical maladies.

For example, Did you know that the most common form of treatment for acne is the pill?

I know, you probably think that we should be grateful for whatever God has chosen to bestow upon us, and that really, women should just live with the skin condition and not complain about the potential scarring or infections.

And, in fairness, you are probably right. I mean, why would teenage girls want to avoid the spiritual growth that bullying can bring.

I am also assuming that your good lady wife and daughters do not suffer from an extreme type of menstruation, so here’s a little biology lesson to help you out:

Menstruation is the shedding of the uterine lining (roughly translated: the walls of the womb bleed until the lining is gone). It occurs on a regular basis in sexually reproductive-age girls/women. Regular menstruation lasts for a few days, usually 3 to 5 days, but anywhere from 2 to 8 days is considered normal. The average menstrual cycle is 28 days long from the first day of one menstrual period to the first day of the next. A normal menstrual cycle is typically between 21 and 35 days between menstrual periods.

Many women experience painful uterine cramps during menstruation. The muscles of the uterus, and abdominal muscles surrounding the uterus, contract spasmodically to push the menstrual fluid out of the uterus. The contractions are produced by the tissue lining the uterus, which is believed to release an excess of fatty acids called prostaglandins that stimulate the muscles, leading to contractions.

Some women experience debilitating symptoms. It is unknown why this occurs in some women and not others. Severe symptoms may include pain spreading to hips, lower back and thighs, nausea and frequent diarrhea or constipation. Treatments target excess prostaglandin, using anti-prostaglandin medications or oral contraceptives.

Now I know what you are going to say. These women deserve the cramps, diarrhoea, constipation, migraines etc.. In fact ALL women should have them. They are after all suffering Divine Retribution for the sin of Eve (the Harlot!).

But really.. after 6.5 thousand years (apparently), surely God is able to let go of his grudge?? Isn’t he supposed to be an ALL-LOVING and ALL-FORGIVING God??

Anyway, I am sure that this is food for thought for you. May contraceptive’s aren’t all bad? Possibly?

Ok, in case you’re not convinced, I’ll give you a more personal example of necessary contraceptive use.

I suffer from a rare adverse reaction to the female hormone Estrogen. This is unfortunate, given that I’m female. Excessive production of the hormone causes tumour-growth on my liver. This means pregnancy is a potentially dangerous thing for me. I can’t take any chances and if I ever do get pregnant it will be very well planned, with specialist doctors and regular scans to make sure tumours aren’t growing and that my liver is not about to haemorrhage. 

In order to not expose myself to a potentially deadly condition I use contraceptives (the coil –  if you must know).

But of course if you don’t see women as people, then you won’t believe that they deserve or are entitled to the best that modern medicine can provide to ensure a healthy and fully functioning life.

Contraception saves lives. But apparently, you don’t believe those lives are worth saving. 

I have been trying to figure out what is my problem with the new phenomenon of Slut walking.
I’m still struggling with it so this may not be as articulate as I want it to be.

As a feminist I want to support it wholeheartedly. I completely agree that anyone (male/female/alien) should have the right to wear whatever they like without fear for their safety.

*addendum: this does not mean I believe people should be free from scrutiny/mockery/hard questions regarding their attire. If you are going to wear ridiculous clothes, I may laugh at you*

I think my problem is that the point is lost in the midst of the protest. The thing I find most objectionable is the connotations around the word Slut. The use of the word implies that to be a female who looks for, and enjoys, casual sex is wrong. It is against type. It is unnatural.

Even the estimable Stephan Fry believes it: Women apparently cannot enjoy sex for it’s own sake. There has to be something in it for us. It’s our bargaining chip. In exchange for the security of a relationship all women lie back and think of England (or whatever country you live in).

This is what *I* want to argue about.

Why isn’t it ok for women to be out and proud about wanting and enjoying sex..
I am blessed in my circle of friends that it doesn’t seem to be an issue. But in society in general, women who behave as “ladettes” - drinking, screwing, having a good time in what was, traditionally, considered a male way, are frowned upon.

The clothes are named slutty, but it’s the behaviour of the women in those clothes that society deems unacceptable. Men may behave in a similar way but will escape the negative connotations attached to it.

At its worst the concept of “slut” leads to the idea of deserving and undeserving victims.
When a rape case is brought to court the sex life of the complainant is called into question. If the woman has had a long, active and varied sex life then her case is harder to prosecute. In the eyes of the public (both male and female) she asked for it. She let it be known that she wanted sex. Now she’s complaining, because it was the wrong sort.
This is daft thinking.
Really.
If a person has had a long and enthusiastic sex life with multiple partners, then clearly they should know what is consensual and what isn’t. In fact the only thing that should be relevant in a court case is if the woman has a history of crying r/ape after every time she had sex. If she hasn’t then her prior history is irrelevant.

This is the attitude towards women that needs to change.

Also, the other thing that has been really annoying me is how Men are perceived in this whole thing.

Apparently, these are the barely in control monsters who, at the mere sight of a bared ankle, will throw you over their shoulder before ravishing you against your will.

Really?? I mean… Really?

Here’s the thing.. Most men don’t rape.. they don’t.. it doesn’t occur to them to do so.. they don’t fight against the urge every second of every day (despite what scott adams may say).

Teaching women to fear men is not the way to an equal society.

Teaching people to respect each other is.

That is the way forward. 

Again.. sorry if it’s a bit rambly.. it’s just been hard to get out of my head and into words.

So when people of a certain age meet in pubs (and by certain age, I mean people around my age) we like to reminisce about our childhoods and the cartoons or tv shows we used to watch.

It’s a bonding thing I think, a way to suss out if this person you are talking to is one of your people or not. It serves a useful purpose in that respect, at least for people from Ireland, the U.K. and the U.S.

So last night at the Skeptics in the pub we were doing just that, reminiscing about cartoons and toys. The eighties were wonderful for cartoons, and it’s far enough in the past that we can’t quite remember how bad the animation was (with some glorious exceptions). 

What struck me in the middle of this discussion was how many cartoons there were with women as the lead roles. Or maybe, that as a young girl in the 80’s I was naturally drawn to cartoons with female leads.

My absolute favourite cartoon was Jem, which not only had strong female leads, it also had ridiculously fabulous female baddies. There was singing, and holograms and fabulous hair. What was not to love (and I still adore the misfits).

Other cartoons that stand out in my mind are Rainbow Brite, She-ra, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Thundercats, and Scooby Doo.

In each of the above the female characters were strong, problem solving, intrinsic members of the shows. They weren’t token characters thrown in to keep the girls happy (or maybe they were, but they never came across that way to me as a child).  These girls/women were my role models. They gave me someone to pretend to be in the playground.

They were cool.

Being April O’Neill was awesome. She was better than the turtles, and she had a video camera. 

My favourite procedural drama (I have always loved them.. even as a kid) was Cagney & Lacey. These women ruled. They weren’t perfect, they had problems, but they still worked hard and achieved in a world not quite ready for them. Also, I discovered today, they won the Emmy best lead actress in a role 6 times in a row.. Which has not been equalled since.

In fact, looking back at a lot of the shows I watched as a kid, the women rocked. From Penny, saving her uncle’s butt in Inspector Gadget, to Miss Piggy, being unapologetically Miss Piggy, these women inspired me.

They told me that I could be whatever I wanted to be. That being a woman was no barrier; That I didn’t, or shouldn’t, ever have to apologise for being me. Being me was more than good enough.

Last night I started to realise that the shows of the eighties most likely made me the feminist I am today and I am glad for it.  

I can’t be the only one. I wonder if there are shows for girls now with the same message.